I think too much!

[Eazy]

I have a problem with over analyzing things. If my buddies take me to a new place I start getting edgy for some reason. Whenever I meet new people I try to give them a good first impression and sometimes I start thinking too much and that throws me off. Like what to say, how to say it and No dont say this or Yes say this all going on at once is driving me crazy. I become weird becuase I freak out and do wrong things. Everyone says I think about this too much, but I cant help it. I wish I could do better!

[npf87]

You have the mental awareness to realize that you think too much. So why can't you also have the mental strength to just tell yourself to shut up? The next time you catch yourself thinking too much, then simply STOP thinking so much! That's all there is to it. It seems that you are even "over-thinking" over-thinking.

[Tim Strong]

yep you are too in your head.

next time you go out i want you to practice 2 things, just two things.

1. being completely present in the moment, and appreciating the fact that you are ALIVE and not dead.

2. not trying to impress anyone, being compeltely free from the outcome and not caring what they think of you, just being your genuine self whether they like it or not.

[Epicure]

That sort of over thinking really is just anxiety.
There are a variety of ways to overcome it.
One way is to train yourself to just not give a fuck about what anyone thinks.
Seriously, an Alpha doesn't worry about acceptance. An Alpha doesn't worry about outcome.
The trick is to recognize when you are over thinking and just repeat to yourself, "it just doesn't matter."

Also, the way to quit thinking so much in Game, in field situations is to practice over and over again.
Eventually, you will learn to trust your intuition. What I am suggesting is to tolerate your over thinking, but keep returning to the same anxiety provoking situation until you get so accustomed to it that you quit over thinking.

Another approach is to intentionally commit social fauxes pas. Quit worrying about doing something wrong and instead, intentionally screw up. The point being that if you do something that will result in your feared most worst outcome and survive it, you won't have to worry so much.

Another technique is to quit focusing on your own internal process and feelings. Social anxiety is mostly a process where you worry about how you are feeling. Instead of focusing on your own feelings, try to put your focus on the other person and what they are saying or feeling. Imagine that they already like you. Assume rapport. Imagine that hey are just as anxious as you and act as if our core energy is comforting to others.

Another way to overcome over thinking is to practice canned material. Memorize a story or a joke. If you are telling a story, you are not focusing on yourself. I am taking this acting class, and the teacher keeps on explaining how if you are really into your character, your self gets pushed aside and you are fully that character. Your PUA avatar is the character that you are creating.

[Lawliet]

I am taking this acting class, and the teacher keeps on explaining how if you are really into your character, your self gets pushed aside and you are fully that character.

In nurolingivstic circles this is known as "behaving as IF".
Very powerfull technique inded. More you do it , it becomes in your nature. That way you can adopt characteristics you copy, and make it part of your own arsenal (ex: Confidence)

[Eazy]

Thanks guy, good points. One thing that gets me is what if I fail and end up seeing those same groups of people the next time around. Should I re-try to open the same set, atleast one of them should remember me lol.

[Epicure]

Easy,

You worry too freaking much. Be a fucking scientist. Reopen them and see what happens. If you get positive results, repeat what you did. If you don't get positive results, then later, look at what happened and change one variable. Stop worrying. Just try out a bunch of stuff until you get the results you want.

Part of the strategy Mystery and that original group of PU artists used was that after every excursion into the field, they would go home and write about the experience and analyze it AFTE the fact. They would not get all hung up on embarrassment or shame or shyness. It is just a debriefing to understand what went right or wrong this time and o begin to recognize the pattern.

YOU are worrying before the fact, before you take action.

Maybe you should try an exercise to get over your over thinking. Wear a piece of overly female jewelry around your neck, something so outrageously female that you know it will attract attention and comments. I am not suggesting peacocking. I am suggesting that you wear something that would embarrass a lesser man. Whenever anyone comments, you must come up with a response about why you are wearing that girlie necklace. If you find that some response works, you repeat it. you practice telling it more slowly. You say it loudly and slowly.

What is the point of this? If you can deal with the attention of wearing something outrageously ridiculous or too Silly, then you will stop worrying about what o do and what o say when you are not wearing that necklace. It is merely practice o stop over thinking before you take action. Save all that neurotic mental anguish for the after infield debriefing.

[BigJohnson]

Epicure has my votes. He is right.

If you want to put some experimentation into motion you should take a step back from the large compilations of situations that make up your life and realize it's gotten you your current world views and feelings. Also realize you'll be constructing this overall feeling for the rest of your days. Your method up to this moment I'm assuming is one of a very serious nature. Your exploring the world, my friend, like all of us. Like Epic said, you're a scientist. You're also an all feeling emotion hub. Apply your energy to experimentation. A great way to detach yourself emotionally from the outcome is to have an experimental state of mind. Go in expecting not failure or success, not good or bad, but just to see what happens period. It's a success if you learn anything at all from it, good or bad. The only failure is not adopting a state of mind that allows you some wiggling room. If you get good results, great! If you get horrible results, great! If you get laid, great! All this will be quickly compiling NEW data and things subconsciously as you go along, creating new, refurbished world views.

As of now you're very emotionally attached to what's going on. You're feeling terribad when you don't get the ten, or when people mistreat you. This is because you're operating on a compiled emotional construct that has guidelines on how you should be responded to. You age, you change, you're not the same man you were a year ago, or ten years ago. Every day your reborn, you have to activate your desired frame of mind. If you don't you'll be on emotional auto pilot, relying on non-innovative compiled emotional constructs. Be the doctor of situations. You can just say that and do that so easily. Emotionally detach yourself from the outcome, say "Ok I want to see what she would say if I kicked her in the shin after I told her I play soccer and I sometimes kick at random." Or "I want to see how this type of guy reacts to me telling him he reminds me of my Aunt." Literally anything. This way there is no guilt. There is no feeling that the "true you sucks because you said this or that." And most importantly the scientist frame of mind has you speaking with a smile/smirk because you know it's a silly experiment. You know what I mean?

[Eazy]

Very good points you guys. Big Johnson you've got me read, I worry to much about the outcome. I kill myself and my mood because of how I feel sometimes. My thing is that i can be myself ifthe people understand who I am.

[Epicure]

Easy,
Too complex, of you thing is that you can only be yourself if people understand who you are, you will always be dependent on your perception of other's understanding of you to feel whole.

Forget that! Create your own avatar as if it is a character from a movie or play in which you are writer, director and actor. Create your own reality of who you are and don't worry about what others think of you.

Otherwise, you will be a slave to your misperceptions of what you incorrectly think others think of you. You don't need he world's approval to be who you are.