in between just sex and true love

[morespace!!]

I have a huge problem. I don't know what kind of mindset I should sport. Say you're dating a slut and everything is superficial and both of you are using eachother and it's just for the sex. Well, then I know how it works and act accordingly. Whatever arises, I just don't give a fuck. But what when you're dating a good-hearted girl and you somewhat care but not enough to be in love. How to act then? More importantly, what kind of frame of mind to have? I can't seem to deal with something when it's in between just sex and true love. What is your advice?

[Saint Colbert]

If you are concerned that she might get hurt, then let her know what to expect. Say something like this when making out: "I really shouldn't be doing this". She will say why or what? You can say: "I know you will just end up getting hurt". If she says, she is up for a challenge and can handle herself, then she is agreeing to explore and will take responsibility for getting in over her head if she gets hurt.

Neither of you two knows what will come of this relationship. You can also ask her if she hates it when you have sex with someone and get into a relationship, but they are a bad person, but you find out months into it and have wasted all that time. Or if she hates it when you develop a relationship, only to find out someone is bad at sex. If she says, yes, she hates that too. Tell her you just want to have fun, get to know her and are not ready for a full blown relationship. If she is down for that, then you have license to explore freely. You can date other people, have sex, get closer or whatever without being bound.

I haven't used this yet myself. I just heard it, and am wanting to put it into play soon.

[The Wild One]

As a man you should decide how to treat the girls you're dating on an individual basis. The goals you form for a relationship with a loving genuinely nice person versus a leech should differ obviously.

The difference between the two girls is how personal you get with them. You need to keep the girls who use or take advantage of people at a distance. They should have as little info on yourself as you can provide. The other short of girl should be allowed to share in more because you can trust her to have your interests at heart. The leech is less helpfull to your personal life thus you treat her like doomed spy. She must be allowed to think she's on level ground with other women while you keep her locked out of your personal life planning for the moment you dump her. The other girl should be incorporated in way's that will be more liberal and personal. It's the difference between a girl you'd trust with your life and the girl who's an inevitable liability.

The Wild One